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Post by Sorairo.Nia. on Jun 18, 2009 17:19:05 GMT -6
How do I get telemarketers to stop calling? I'm tired of answering the phone about 3 to 4 times a day and it turns out to be a telemarketer.
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Post by мғв=Bane on Jun 19, 2009 7:29:11 GMT -6
How do I get telemarketers to stop calling? I'm tired of answering the phone about 3 to 4 times a day and it turns out to be a telemarketer. I will laugh loudly in BAMM says something along the lines of "get caller ID and don't answer the phone if you don't recognize the number" or "let the answering machine screen your calls". BAMM, why is the sea salty?
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Post by badassmailman on Jun 20, 2009 0:24:51 GMT -6
How do I get telemarketers to stop calling? I'm tired of answering the phone about 3 to 4 times a day and it turns out to be a telemarketer. You're dumb, you shouldn't regret the telemarketers. No, you should CHERISH them. Think about it, they are people, they are trying to make a few more bucks on the side, but most importantly, they have bosses. Now, there are many ways to get telemarketers to stop calling you: 1. Be an ass. This is obvious, the more times you cuss or "yell" at your kid to shut up (you are telling them that you are your mom/dad, right?) the more difficult you are to deal with, thus you are a hard sell, often too distracted with your actual situation. --sadly, this is ineffective, you are only put on a sort of warning list, ie: you're still on their list. 2. Be kind. Yes, you can be SO kind that they wont call you back. When they ask for a donation/buy a product all you have to say is "Oh i wish i could, but im not sure if i can afford it" telemarketers have cheatsheets so give them a trick. They will give you a few lines about how easy it is on the wallet. Your response: "No, I meant i dont know how i could afford not to own it, lawl (literally, lawl)." You will then share a laugh (if the telemarketer is female) or silence (if male). Now they are gonna try to sell it to you again(---literally, it's the same line with more definite adjectives). But here's where the critical moment comes through: turn the phone to speaker and make your cell phone do the ring (scroll through the ringtones until you get one that's loud) and answer the phone. "Answer" your phone and start sounding sad about any option like: brother went to jail, grandma died, w/e, anything that would cost a lot of money (bail, funeral in the cases i mentioned). Halfway through, turn off the telemarketers phone from speaker, but make sure to say "shit, i left the phone on speaker." Now start proposing a trade so that you can still afford it and explain that you are now lacking any real money to waste and are actually behind on your rent now. They now view you as poor and are unable to make a sell, but you wont be bothered for awhile. --again, you are put onto a kind of warning list, but on the bright side, it's hella fun to do 3. The method I perfected while talking to S.A.D.D. : The asshole questioner. You know that guy that always goes "why?" Yeah, you gotta become THAT GUY (or girl). SADD used to be Students Against Drunk Driving, but it became Students Against Distructive Decisions. I have spent 3 good 30 minute conversations with people about how this is less efficient and more importantly, vague. I told them that this was way too difficult to enforce and that they are branching into other organizations' territory with it. I know i got all 3 of those idiots fired. I had them call their managers and ask their managers it, I heard the argument, i also heard a different voice tell me that [name of telemarketer] has to deal with another client. So i said your welcome for the business advise. Now this is HIGHLY flexible. All you need to do is find a flaw in an organization and then question about it. The more on your feet you think, the better. Remember to yell at your kids, it keeps the 'marketer off balance and they may actually think you are bipolar. In general the angrier you can be when not talking to the telemarketer, the better. And then couple it with the most sincere you can be while speaking directly to the telemarketer. Seriously, it's a scary tactic. The more times you mention to the telemarketer information that you shuold not tell anybody (penis envy/boob envy, performance in bed, rashes, workout regimines, eating disorders, think your kid is on drugs) the better. Remember, they will not hang up on you unless you are impossible to sell to. The trick is to keep the 'marketer on the phone the longest and remain unable to be sold to (that gets them fired). The best things to do are: 1. Yell at kids 2. Cheer for TV 3. Put 'marketer on hold (go to "bathroom" come back in 45 seconds and say "sorry, it was a phantom crap") 4. eat a saltine 5. make toast 6. make tea (in a kettle) It is not your goal to get them to not call by telling them not to (it does nothing). The goal is the get them to not call because they dont want to. Fomo, I do have caller ID, that's how i know to answer the telemarketers The sea is salty because those 3 telemarketers i got fired cried all day and night (♫day and night [day and night]♫) about their sad sad lives and they just so happened to do it into the ocean.
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Post by Mac on Jun 20, 2009 4:33:19 GMT -6
Telemarketers are poor college kids like myself trying to get money. I got offered a job being a telemarketer but denied cause my roomate was one and he said it sucked ass, cause people are dicks. They arn't normally people with sad lives. Some people might do it as a second job to make some side money. But it's mostly college kids trying to make a few bucks. It actually pays real well (I hear 10-12 an hour plus bonuses for sales).
Anyways, my question is...
Do you say soda or pop? I say pop. Sodapop is not an answer.
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Post by badassmailman on Jun 20, 2009 22:55:31 GMT -6
Telemarketers are poor college kids like myself trying to get money. Think about it, they are people, they are trying to make a few more bucks on the side, but most importantly, they have bosses. I'm pretty sure that's what i said, it's just that i needed a segway to "how to get a telemarketer fired." But no, i do not regret getting them fired, they were bad at it. Bad drivers shouldn't be taxi cab drivers, bad players dont play in the professional leagues, i dont eat bad bread, and bad telemarketers shouldn't be marketing over the telephone. Not my fault that hanging up on me goes against some moral issue they have. And to answer your real question: You should say coke. In atlanta at the airport i had to order a coke sprite because apparently saying "sprite" doesn't work. --At jimmy johns, when im on register, i say pop because that's what the register says (but i often say drink too). ----otherwise, I say soda because it sounds like soba, which is delicious and soda is good as well so yeah.... soda is #1 pop is #2 drink/drinks is #3 coke is #1 funniest but overall, just be a man and specify your drink say "i'll have a dr pepper" or "i'll have an iced tea." Even when you order a pussy drink like iced tea you are still manlier that the guy that says "i'll have a small pop." And sodapop is the biggest pussy move ever. It's like "i dont want to offend you, so i'll say the combination of them." Fuck that PC shit, be a man and tell them what's up by ordering your pop or your soda.
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Post by мғв=Bane on Jun 21, 2009 14:50:42 GMT -6
Why do people want to do stupid things?
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Post by badassmailman on Jun 22, 2009 23:19:38 GMT -6
why do people do stupid things?
Well, as the old cliche goes: stupid is in the eye of the beholder.
Now, some would argue that getting a penis branded onto your ass is a stupid thing. However, for Bam Margera in Jackass 2 it was a way to sell tickets to a movie, which earned him a show, which made him even more money. Yes, you probably thought it was dumb, but who lives in a mansion? That's right, that stupid guy.
The Catholic church said Capernicus was stupid, people told Acryte that backwalking and side hopping were slower than rolling in OoT/MM (they are wrong, it's WAY faster), people thought I was dumb for moving my sleeping bag when it really only made things more crowded. Sure enough, that room started to fill with CO2 gas and smelled horribly from a chemical reaction that took place in the garbage. So yeah, some people think it's dumb, but I bet they think that there are quite a few things that you do that are equally dumb
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Post by Sorairo.Nia. on Jun 25, 2009 19:19:02 GMT -6
How long can the human body survive without water?
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Post by мғв=Bane on Jun 25, 2009 20:02:30 GMT -6
Why am I tempted to use Roshea in Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon?
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Post by мғв.TheOgbot on Jun 25, 2009 20:19:57 GMT -6
How long can the human body survive without water? 3 days, but if you're BAMM, you'll never die. Period. BAMM, why am I so bored?
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Post by badassmailman on Jun 26, 2009 0:13:39 GMT -6
actually, if it's around 50 degrees outside, you can live pretty long without water, assuming you stay in the shade.
But here's my math for it. Humans are 60% water. Humans can thus live 60% of the days in the year drinking a lot of water and the other 40% without it. Therefore without water a human should be able to live 146.4 days without water on a leap year, unless i did the math wrong, but i doubt it.
But don't worry, you live in the great US of A and even if you're low on water, just put a turban on, grow a bad beard, and say "Death to America" in some Area 51 joint. You'll get waterboarded=free water amirite?
fomo, it's because the name sounds cool, i say you do it
og: Get a life
<3, BAMM
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Post by Sorairo.Nia. on Jun 27, 2009 15:11:33 GMT -6
Emily the Strange or Creepy Susie?
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Post by badassmailman on Jun 28, 2009 10:40:07 GMT -6
Emily the strange. I hate the oblongs
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Post by Sorairo.Nia. on Jun 29, 2009 15:16:15 GMT -6
Why do you hate the Oblongs?
Why do mosquito bites feel so itchy?
How do I get a mosquito bite to stop feeling so itchy?
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Post by мғв=Bane on Jun 29, 2009 20:02:14 GMT -6
Where can I find a free lunch?
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