Corruptawish 2: return of the pain

[мғв=Bane]

Yup. Og's wish spawned this slithering thread from the depths of the earth. Og won't live long enough to see it through, however, as Lavos will destroy the earth before he reads this.

So, I wish for cupcakes.

[KSpam]

Wish granted. You take a bite of your new cupcakes. They taste delicious, so delicious in fact, that you decide to have another. And another. And another. Soon you have eaten all your cupcakes. But you're still hungry. You walk around trying to find more of these cupcakes but instead find a hobo, begging for cash. You become enraged that this lowly little man has impeded your quest for cupcakes. You begin beating the man, beating him and beating him until he slumps over, dead. You are so hungry, you look at the corpse, and consumed by your hunger, you begin to eat it. You find the taste delicious, almost like the cupcakes you love so much. You soon start running around the city at night, murdering innocents to quench your insane hunger. You are eventually caught and sentenced to hang. At your execution, you look into the crowd and our eyes drift to a man. He is cloaked, holding a cupcake that looks exactly like the ones you loved so much. But you look closely and see that there is one key difference. There is a human finger sticking out of this cupcake. Faced with the shocking truth, you simply do nothing. You stare at the cupcake and you long to taste it one last time. Staring on at the animal you've become, the man grins and tosses the cupcake at your feet. The last thing you hear before the floor gives way and leaves at the mercy of the noose is this: "Just as planned." I wish I could understand our place in the universe.

[C307]

Wish granted. The knowledge of the universe tears you apart on the inside. Soon you end up insane and locked up in loony-ville. After that you try to explain what you know, no one listens, your still a mad man. Eventually you kill yourself in the pain of knowing.

I wish i didn't have to go to graduation for the next three years.

[Sorairo.Nia.]

Wish Granted. One bad thing about that, you now can't attend your high school graduation. Which means you never get your high school diploma. You can't even get a decent job now. You live the rest of your life dumpster diving, selling what you find off the streets for a very tiny sum of money.

I wish I could just take the ACT test now. Waiting for tommorow is driving me nuts.

[KSpam]

Congrats, you now take the ACT today. And tomorrow. And the day after tat. Etc Etc. I wish for something exciting to happen *secretly hopes something will happen because life is boring as hell*

[мғв=Bane]

What?
Something is happening!
Something exciting!

You are playing Brawl against Og and losing while he is brushing his teeth with his feet!

I wish I had an all 31 IV Salamence with an adamant nature.

[мғв.TheOgbot]

Granted. You also get 255 EVs in every stat making the Pokemon illegal.

I wish I could do Summer Theater Workshop for the rest of my life

[Sorairo.Nia.]

Wish granted. You now repeat the same day over and over and over and over and over again. It continues to go on until the most logical way to escape this is to kill yourself. You do it and it doesn't work, you wake up to the same day. So now you're stuck in a neverending day. Enjoy it Og.^^

As crazy as it sounds, I wish I had summer school.

[мғв=Bane]

Your teacher recommends you for summer school, and you go. Everytihng seems alright until I walk into the room. Slightly taken aback, you wonder "Why is he here?" After deciding to ask that question I reply: "because this is a challenging class and I want to improve my ability". After a brief pause the teacher, a grizzled old man, walks in with a giant textbook he slams down upon his desk.

"I trust you have all read the class standards form and read the required material for this class" he boringly ejaculates while gesticulating and pacing back and forth, "therefore we will begin with a test of your knowledge on the subject". You look down at the first question and it reads:

"One two cars are approaching an intersection. Car A is approaching at 79 meters per second from the west, and Car B is approaching at 68 kilometers per hour from the south. The two collide elastically and momentum is conserved. In what direction and what velocity do both of the cars move after the collision?"

Stuned, your mouth drops open. "Finish this test in an hour," the teacher nonchalontly speaks as he ambles over to his desk and sits down before falling asleep. Somehow you know that this summer is going to hurt.

I wish I knew for how long Emergency would be without electronics.

[Emergency]

Wish granted. The time is infinity.

I wish I could have my electronics back.

Lucky for me, I've got ninja skills to get by parents.

[Sorairo.Nia.]

Wish Granted. You must answer three questions and cross the Bridge of Death in order to get your electronics back. You fail on answering the second question and you're cast off into the Gorge of Enternal Peril.

I wish I could get together with my friend Ashley today.

[KSpam]

Wish granted. On your way you meet the Black Knight. He dismembers you and ten falls on some tree branches which sever his limbs. Again. Don't worry, tis only a flesh wound! I wish for the Necronomicon.

[missdemented]

Our hero SS=kspam receives the Necronomicon from an old hag, who smells of toilet water, lemon Pledge, and that mystery smudge in my iguana's tank. Our hero tries to summon Chip the Chiffon Cake Warrior from Down the Drain. I'd say our hero had success, but that wouldn't be much of corruption now would it? Back to this tale, instead of Chip the Chiffon Cake Warrior...our hero summons a demon that burns him to a crisp. Our hero survives with just third degree burns and women will never find him attractive again. Moral of this calumnious tale: our hero should never accept gift from mystery hags and I should never write stories after downing my second large Mocha Frappuccino with three shots of espresso.

I wish for a Frappuccino.

[Sorairo.Nia.]

Wish Granted. You have your frappuccino and enjoy it. Later that day, you get another one and die of a caffine overdose.

I wish for harmony.

[мғв.TheOgbot]

Granted, your personal definition of harmony becomes dissonance, making the oscillating sound known as dissonance become any harmony you hear. Your ears want to tear themselves off.

I wish I could think of one more little sig to add to my big sig :/

OGBOTEDIT: I found it

I wish for a taco.